Well. Safe to say I've been gone for far too long.

It's almost been a year since I've updated this blog, and the only excuse I can give is the fact that my life's been so crazy these past few months that I couldn't even stand to write about it. From getting sick (why couldn't I have gotten normal chickenpox like everyone else?) to quitting school for the semester to shifting into a course I love (YES!)...a lot's happened, but that isn't why I'm writing.

I'm writing because not only have I proved how crazy I am, I don't mind one bit. Why?

I'm joining NaNoWriMo 2010.

Tomorrow kickstarts the 30-day descent into writing madness and dependency on coffee and time management, and honestly, I couldn't be more excited. Everyone I've told so far has told me I'm crazy for doing this, considering that school's starting again and I have so much to adjust to. Plus, while I have a plot, I don't actually know what goes on in the middle. Heck, even the editor part of my personality is screaming at me to stop this. How am I supposed to manage 50000 words when I can barely think of one sentence some of the time?

But you know what? I. Don't. Care.

Honestly, it doesn't matter if I reach 50K (well, it does, but whatever.) I'm doing this to finally kickstart the idea that's taken permanent residence in my head, and hopefully finish even a part of the rough draft. NaNoWriMo isn't about creating the next best-selling novel outright--it's about starting that future novel, in order to get down the story you want to tell. It's a good motivation, and honestly, it just seems fun.

To everyone who's taking part of the journey, best of luck to you and to all of us. Let's make this one hell of a ride :)

It's midterms week of second semester, and I am freaking out.

This semester is....weird. I don't know if that's the accurate word for it, but it's the only one that comes to mind. The teachers are vastly different in attitude from the ones I had last sem, and the atmosphere is actually very relaxed.

And because the high school I went to has completely warped my brain out of what is considered normal, all the relaxation? Yeah, definitely worrying me.

I'm in the school library, killing time before my next class, doing...well, this. I'm supposed to be working on a piece of homework, but to hell with it--if there's anything I've learned in my 4 years of high school, it's perfecting the fine art of cramming. My mind is a strange jumble of random thoughts and ideas and because there's no one at the moment who can understand my brand of crazy, I'm venting it all out here before I explode.

In a nutshell, this is life right now: 

A. School is hell. A very relaxed hell, but hell all the same.

B. Friends are as sadistic as ever. Thank goodness--if they turned normal and boring, I think the apocalypse would be on its way.

C. My English skills are dying. Just yesterday I blanked on what the progressive tenses were. I recovered at the last minute, but still...crap.

D. Glee and American Idol = my entire life. Sad, I know.

E. Rachel and Puck are getting together and singing a song in the back nine! That fact is making me giddy with delight *see letter D, please.*

F. My muse has disappeared into the depths of the earth again.

G. I just heard Mika's song, "Lollipop" and I don't know whether to be scandalized/amused at all the innuendos in the music video, or surprised that I can't seem to stop listening to the song. Darn songs with catchy tunes.

H. Speaking of catchy songs, Pants on the Ground is stuck in my head. Oh my god.

I. It's the middle of midterms, and I'm pretty sure I killed it--and not in a good way, either. Also yesterday, I forgot the term 'Caps Lock' in our computer exam. This is the result of trying to juggle too much information all at once.

J. I am firmly convinced that Statistics (to be specific, Probability) is a demon sent from hell to inflict pain and low grades on poor, unsuspecting college freshmen.

K. Did I mention that Glee and American Idol are my life?

So, yeah, I don't really think that that could be considered a nutshell, but all the same, that's it. Pathetic, right? But like I said, I need an outlet--all the normal is constricting; I need a large dose of crazy and random to make me feel sane again.

Oooookkkaaayyyyy..........I just re-read this again and realized that this is more or less a rambling mess so I'll stop now. Till the next time I feel the urge to vent :)

I am currently trying to undo three weeks worth of laziness and general relaxation. Not an easy task.

2nd semester has begun! Well, actually it began last Wednesday, but I didn't bother going to school then, because hardly any teachers show up on the first week anyway. After three weeks of generally being a lazy bum, it's now back to waking up at 6 am and listening to thought-provoking lectures about debits and credits *note the sarcasm, please* After going through a grueling enrollment process (which resulted in a very late lunch and slightly annoyed friends at my being late once again)  I am now once again back to the land of the normal and logical where I usually take down notes whilst simultaneously daydream about random things.

Our 1st sem grades haven't been released yet--here's hoping they'll be out soon so I can find out my average. I'm still clinging to the getting-thinner-and-thinner-by-the-day illusion that I'll get into Dean's List. *crosses fingers*

These next few months are going to be undoubtedly filled with more memories and difficult lessons. Yay. Let the new semester begin.

(Oh, wait. It already has ; )

Okay. It's official: I have become a Gleek.

It's been a week since I discovered Glee, and I've been hooked ever since, to borrow a phrase from a Christina Aguilera song. It's not a perfect show by any means--some characters are stereotypical, and sometimes, it's hard to like Rachel because of her diva attitude. But it's easy to overlook that when everything else is just Plain. Freakin. Awesome.

First of all, the songs and musical performances are made of pure WIN. I love the songs they performed, and have also come to love the songs they've sang that I'm not familiar with. "Somebody to Love" was amazing, and their rendition of Keep Holding On--especially with the Quinn baby drama--left me tearing up. Finn and Rachel singing together? Crazy good.

The storyline is refreshing and interesting. I like how they manage to explore each character, not just Finn and Rachel, and make them undergo character development. Sue Sylvester is a force to be reckoned with. Only she can be someone so incredibly frightening yet so entertaining to watch. I'm currently hating on Mr. Schue's wife, with everything she's doing, and I've repeatedly yelled at my computer screen to Mr. Schue that she's a lying crazy person. Sadly, he just doesn't listen. Oh well. It's still early.

It's also really nice how, underneath the jokes and storylines, there are lessons and insights you can get from the show, and they portray it in a good, natural way instead of shoving it down our throats and blatantly state it rather than show it .

Also currently loving Will and Emma--they are adorable together, really. And Puck....oh dear. Puck. A guy who sleeps with moms, gets his best friend's girlfriend pregnant, has a mohawk, and is generally badass should not be swoon-worthy. But he is. Oh dear. I think I'm beginning to have an interest in the bad boy types--it's probably a good thing I'm feeding that interest through fiction, though. And I'm also starting to ship Puck and Rachel after the eighth episode. They have great chemistry together, and I've always firmly believed in opposites attracting. And the fanfic about them is great :)

Okay, rant over. I just needed to get it off my chest, seeing as my friends are now pretending not to be online after listening to me rant and rave about Glee over and over again. It's still in it's early days, but so far, it's made me smile. Sing. Dance. Be angry. Cry. It's generated a lot of emotions, and I think that's one of the measures of how good a show is--being able to stir feelings and reactions from viewers, and Glee?
 
Well, it's definitely done it for me.

Finals week is finally over, and I can finally breathe. Yay!

After a week of hermit-ing and marrying myself to my studies, I'm finally done with final exams. We had our major exam this morning, and after that, no more school! Today marks the end of the first semester of college. Today also marks the start of a three-week break, and my lazy, vacation-loving heart is dancing with joy.

I'm especially thrilled for this break because it means I'll be seeing my best friends again. See, we all went to different schools for college, and we haven't really had so many chances to meet up this semester, so we've planned to make the most of our break. Apart from the fact that we havent seen each other in awhile, we're taking advantage of the break to fix our deteriorating English skills--since we went our separate ways and found no one else to speak straight, pure English on a daily basis to in our new schools, it's gotten somewhat rusty. Ah, I can just see it now: sitting in some random location talking in rapid English about fanfiction....each other's lives....Happy Tree Friends and other random/sadistic stuff...how to take over the world...erm, okay, maybe not that last bit   *laughs nervously as she hides a folder labeled "World Domination Plans" behind her*

Another thing I feel happy about is the fact that I'm getting my writing inspiration back. With such a practical course as the one I'm taking, college has slowly been sucking the creativity out of me, but I've finally found my muse and am planning to chain it somewhere so it can't escape off into the Bahamas again without helping me write a new LWD fic. Already new ideas for oneshots and a multichapter are swimming in my head, so I hope to get a decent amount of writing done this break.

Hey, my mother did tell me to do something productive for the three weeks of no school. Writing fics about step-sibs who have ridiculous amounts of UST and chemistry and who just need to get together for the sake of every Dasey shipper's sanity is considered productive, right?

*Nods vigorously to self* Of course it is.

This is totally random and otherwise unrelated to the rest of this post but, speaking of LWD...Ruby and the Rockits. Um, okay, similarities much? Let's see...girl gets a new family, has interesting chemistry with someone who's supposed to be a family member --a family member who likes to party and play music---, they annoy each other, he listens to her through the vent...sound familiar anyone? Too bad it got cancelled though. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.

Here's to a week filled with fanfics, the English language, friends, and solitaire! *Grins widely*

It is with great sadness that I am able to say that my country now somewhat knows how Katrina must've felt like.

The worst rainfall, the worst flooding in about 40 years. Mud-streaked water reaching as high as fifteen feet, entering houses and buildings and causing people to climb to their roofs. Cars sinking beneath the water and electricity dead. Landslides. The streets looking like a really bad imitation of Venice. An estimated hundred dead and many more missing. Typhoon Ondoy was no Katrina, but that doesn't mean it's effects weren't as devastating.

It's sickening and heart-breaking to watch the news right now. Never did I think that this might actually happen, and now, seeing the plight of all these people puts into perspective how petty some of my problems are in comparison. Rich or poor, no one was spared, and I guess it's true that all men are equal when it comes to the wrath of nature.

I don't live in Manila. Further south, it wasn't as bad, but we still felt the rain, the wind--all the things we've done wrong to the environment turning around and kicking us in the ass. I can't imagine how the victims must be feeling right now--the thought of having to rebuild their lives without knowing where to start, well, it's a scary thought, alright. I do hope that the current outpouring of aid and support from various people will help them feel that they are not alone. The only good thing that has come out of this tragedy, I think, is the fact that the whole country has managed to unite once more in order to help those people who are in need.

This was intended to be a long post, but I'm having a difficulty expressing myself as this calamity has hit so close to home. As for me, right now, all I can do is offer my prayers and hope that, in the words of Annie, "the sun will come out tomorrow."

Oh dear. Ohdearohdearohdear times infinity.

(Just a warning: I'm about to vent/rant/rave. You have been warned.)

Today has got me thinking: Is this sort of feeling normal for college freshmen? Or is it just me?

Pre-finals today. Only three weeks more till the end of the first semester and I'm feeling a high level of dread. We only had two tests today, but I'm already feeling like those two tests have screwed up my chances of getting into Dean's List and my future in general. I kept grinning during the Accounting exam. Grinning, people. Apart from the fact that it makes me look a little bit crazy, past experience has taught me that grinning and being oddly calm during exams only leads to epic failing. Damn.

Oh, and guess what? I only realized this morning that our Filipino test was today.

If I could pull an Alex Russo and clone myself, I'd probably hit me on the head. What kind of person forgets when her pre-final for that subject is? Off to Cramming City I went, bringing with me my Currently Freaking Out card. The test was intimidating, especially since I'm not that good in Filipino (shameful since I am Filipino, but I've been brought up to speak English since I could talk. Sue me.)

Now that the tests are over (two down, eight more to go next week. Oh joy.) my Currently Freaking Out card has grown neon lights and it's flashing for the whole world to see. Because I'm in this mood where I'm constantly anxious over my grades, and I have this feeling that bombing on even one test is going to screw up my entire future. I also have this feeling that if I dont get into the Dean's List, my future is screwed anyway. College is supposed to be fun, and yet here I am, being irrational and going crazy over this whole thing. Gah, I don't know anymore. Maybe the pressure from my parents is getting to me. Or maybe this is normal for people still adjusting to college. Or maybe I'm feeling insanely negative because I don't love the course I'm taking up. Maybe this, maybe that...all I know is (and as one of my friends oh-so eloquently told me), I need to remember how to breathe before I end up becoming more insane.

Breathe. Yeah, I can do that. *In, out, deep, even--starts to hyperventilate* 

Yup, as you can see, definitely not in the best of moods.

I raise my Mocha Frappuccino and make a toast to Acadmic Death. Yippee.

Now, I must find me some Dasey fanfiction/news/anything or some writing inspiration or...well, anything I love, really, to lift my spirits up. Hopefully by the next time I post something, it'll actually be sane and happy....okay, maybe just happy.

May the Starbucks be with you.

Okay. So.

(As far as the first few words of a first ever journal entry go, those two are pretty epic.)

(Okay. Not really. But I want to get this out of the way and I'm feeling crazier than usual, so let's just go with it, mmkay?)

After an extremely long bout of a disease most commonly known as Laziness, I've finally gotten around to actually making an LJ account. Here's hoping this one actually sticks, because I have this habit of joining forums and stuff and then totally forgetting I actually have accounts in those sites. Although, considering that I've been living inside my head these days, I think I'll need this outlet.

Obsession isn't healthy, and according to my friends, I need to fix mine. And since the first step in fixing a problem is admitting you have one, well, here:

Things I need to Stop Obsessing About:

1. Solitaire. It's addictive, seriously.
2. Finishing the first chapter of my Dasey fanfic. Where's that muse when I need it??
3. Longing to shift from Accountancy to an English course. Stupid practicality *grumbles*
4. "My Immortal"--the worst fanfic in the history of fanfiction. I think I just killed a good deal of braincells reading it...and at the same time, it's so hilarious that I can't seem to stop.
5. A Very Potter Musical. That thing is made of so much win, I can't even find other words to describe it.

I apologize if anyone reading this finds the writer slightly imbalanced and/or random in any way. It's still the first post, after all.

Till next time, kiddies.